Posts filed under ‘Sex and Religion




A nuanced, unabashed look at teens, sex and religion

Eileen E. Flynn

14 April 2007

Austin American-Statesman

Sociology professor and author Mark D. Regnerus says teens who participate more in church are less likely to be sexually active.

Warning: This column might make you blush.

I know it’s going to make me a little squeamish. And I think that’s part of the point. Religion and sex, to adapt a phrase, make uneasy bedfellows.

But they intersect regularly in the lives of American teenagers. And Mark D. Regnerus, assistant sociology professor at the University of Texas, has found some surprising accounts of how faith influences the sexual decisions of teens.

In his new book, “Forbidden Fruit: Sex and Religion in the Lives of American Teenagers,” Regnerus debunks some myths about trends in teen sexuality, explores the effectiveness of abstinence-only education and hears from those who pledge virginity until marriage or try to determine their “emotional readiness” for sex.

You can catch him talking about the book 5 p.m. Tuesday at Follett’s Intellectual Property bookstore, 2402 Guadalupe St. (For more information, call 478-0007 or go to www.intellectualpropertyaustin.com [http://www.intellectualpropertyaustin.com].)

Regnerus used survey data and in-person interviews with more than 250 teens across the country to find out how beliefs and participation in faith communities shape their actions.

The news and entertainment media send frightening, and often not fully accurate, messages, he says. “More teen girls experiment with bisexuality,” announces one headline. “Kids who take abstinence pledges more likely to have anal sex,” blares another. Movies and TV shows glamourize budding teen sexuality.

What are parents and church leaders to do with this information?

“Forbidden Fruit” paints a more nuanced picture, offering insight into that emotionally volatile world of teenhood. The interviews yield some expected accounts of sex: “I thought I was ready, but you know, obviously I wasn’t,” says one Catholic girl who had sex at 16.

But the book reveals some misconceptions about Evangelical Protestant teens whom we most often associate with abstinence pledges and sexual purity. Though they tend to hold more conservative attitudes about sex, Regnerus found that, as a group, their sexual activity is fairly average.

The key is being plugged into a religious community, Regnerus says. Participation, rather than denomination, is the factor that makes a difference.

Let me give you a little background here about Regnerus. He’s 36 and grew up in Michigan, the son of a minister in the Reformed Church in America, a small denomination founded in the colonial period by Dutch settlers. He now attends Covenant Presbyterian Church in North Austin with his wife and two children.

As a person of faith, he appreciates the influence of religion on teenagers. As a dad, he’s well aware of the challenges he’ll face when his own kids reach their raging hormones phase.

He understands that it’s not easy to talk about sex. And in the age of easy access to Internet pornography, religious and nonreligious parents alike fret about the images and messages that could confront their children.

“It’s a strange new world,” Regnerus said, adding that porn is “radically shaping how adolescent boys and (young) men think about sex, think about women.”

With those images so prevalent, how should churches treat sex? Is it a sacred act? A profane one? Is it both?

These are good questions, but Regnerus says religious communities aren’t raising them. Most teens would be hard-pressed to articulate their denomination’s teachings on sex, other than “it’s best to wait for marriage.”

I asked him what approach best serves teens.

“The emotionally healthiest thing to do is wait,” Regnerus said. “That seems pretty clear for the evidence.”

But he immediately anticipated the next question: Wait for what? Marriage? A monogamous adult relationship? How do parents and religious institutions prepare young people?

In his “unscientific postscript,” Regnerus stresses that his book aims to show “what is, not what ought to be.” But he’s not afraid to share his opposition to abstinence-only education, and he stresses that kids do want to hear about sex from their parents.

“The idea of ‘the talk’ has to go away,” he said. “It must be an ongoing dialogue.”

And another thing troubled him: the gender double standard.

“We wink at (boys) and we tell girls to wait,” he said.

Yet another complicated issue. It is different for girls. Regnerus found that teen girls struggled more with the guilt and emotional pain associated with sex.

He writes in his postscript, “. . . if congregations intend to be faithful to their own teachings about the body and sexuality, they should stop winking at this double standard, acknowledge it, and start having more frank conversations about the real sexual issues that real people face.”

Provided they can stop blushing long enough.

confession..?

I liked this article because it is an ongoing debate. Almost everyone is aware that religion and Sex don’t mix so to have somebody involved in religion talk about sex the way they do in this story is refreshing. I think it is a well written article and I like the way there is a little humour injected

(more…)

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